When the dance connection tears your heart apart - and how to stay with yourself

Again and again we discuss Dancing Queens Team very special connections. It happens to many of us, especially in the bachata, kizomba or zouk scene: you're dancing with someone and suddenly there's this incredible connection. Three minutes feel like three hours or become much more than 1 to 3 songs, the world disappears, only the two of you remain. Creativity arises, I wasn't even aware that I could dance like this. Pure inspiration and the heart opens up. This intense connection is addictive, because it often doesn't happen. My only thought: time, please stand still. Don't let go of me when the song is over and dance another one. I hate to admit: far too often I have already started to idealize the other person in my head, imagining what it would be like if it went even further: "This is the love I was looking for". 

Just as quickly as the feeling came, it's gone again: he or she gives me a hug, says thank you and on to the next one. Or he says goodbye with the sentences "I really need a drink" or "I need a smoke".

So he/she disappears from your field of vision. For you, or at least for me, it feels like your heart is being ripped out. Strange feelings of jealousy arise when this person experiences the same connection with someone else, or at least it looks like it - I catch myself watching where this person is dancing. Inwardly I say to myself: Is it still possible? Back to reality - I've often asked myself: Why does this happen? 

I want to show you: You're not the only one this happens to. And above all: you can learn to enjoy the magic without losing yourself in the abyss afterwards.

Please note: This text is based on our own thoughts and feelings in the Dancing Queens team - from conversations with us, but also with customers, friends, etc. It is important for us to make one thing clear:

Every feeling on the dance floor is okay.

The important thing is that you don't project your feelings onto others or "impose" them on them. And that you are aware that not all of your feelings will be mirrored by the other person in the same way. Be honest with those around you - and with yourself. Enjoy the connections, because there is hardly anything better. But also pay close attention to your emotional world and make sure you do what is really good for you.